Thursday, October 28, 2021

What's wrong with me?

The life that I live
The happiness I laugh through
The pain that I cry out 
The loneliness that envelopes me
Can that be explained to someone?

Not with words; they never communicate,
They are hollow pictures
That never carry anything in the frame.
Maybe with a look, Or a touch or as a memory,
I just need my life written by them

I am tired sometimes, of myself
And the world within
It never unfolds as "normalcy" expects
And I always end up
Doubting my own sanity all the time...

I guess I need some rest and good sleep!







Wednesday, October 20, 2021

Two Words!

"Sorry" is a word
That is as ancient as the scriptures 
"Grateful" is another word
That again carries beautiful shades

"I am" is a tiny prefix
When added with these words
Brings out their true meaning 
And touches the depths of your heart

And those two words
They stay with me now
Like partners forever 
To fill the vacuum you created 

I knew from the beginning 
The inevitable end that awaited us
The weight of love laws
That always broke people to pieces

Life moves on like a speed boat
Swiftly changing the tapestry behind
But the gentle touch of water remains
So does your memories linger

I am sorry for the pain I caused 
I am grateful for your unique gift
There I have done it now
The words are out and I am free(maybe!)

Wednesday, October 13, 2021

Friendship!

I can write prose and poetry today
Prose that rhymes like poetry
And poetry that is clear like prose

I can count the stars today
And the droplets in the ocean
And even find the secret of infinity

I can laugh hard and cry shamelessly 
Count the endless sins of my life
And blessing too again in countless numbers 

I can shout at the top of my voice 
Dance to the rhythm of the tuneless melodies
Even talk to faceless strangers for a smile

What I can’t do today my friend 
Is to loose your friendship to baseless rumours 
And fragile and weightless emotions 

For friendships always carry me through
The dangerous shores I drift through
And the thoughtless decisions I stick to

And friends form the backbone
Of this darkest comedy called life
Which folds and unfolds in unknown ways

So, please stay with me friend
To have a tea and pleasant chat
Let’s forget the past and the coming future
And freeze this moment in a light laugh!

Tuesday, October 12, 2021

Dream!

I had a dream
Not a terrible one
But a bitter sweet dream
That smelled of fresh lemons and rain.

It was half a dream
Where someone screamed
And I ended up being attacked
By the tiny minion packs in yellow.

Still it was the half-dream
Where I was nearly happy
Though I was hurt and bruised
I had found the yellow lady of happiness.

I was a child
A happy playing child
The kind who never gets bored
And always smiles in sunshine yellow

I wish I stayed in the dream
And lived a happy life
With the yellow little minion packs
And plenty of guileless smiles!

Wednesday, October 06, 2021

A Revelation!


I have always been worried
Of million things that never existed
The demons of the dark
Creating shadows with my fear,
The sadness that tagged along
With every beautiful day that unfolded,
The tiny bits of frustration 
Scattered across every beautiful relationship,
The rains that followed the clouds,
The miserable hours spend doing nothing,
The unending spirals of “what ifs”,
The fear of being the out cast...

Until the sudden bout of a rainbow
Finally taught me the inevitable.
I am Infinite and ever expanding
Because I am The Universe!

Tuesday, October 05, 2021

Smiles & Sadness!

Some people carry pain
Like how some others carry a smile
Gently, lightly, but constantly
Like an extra limb of the body

Smiles and sadness, the strangest brothers
One lits up the eyes, the other sucks it away
What can we call the unlike twins
Who are exact opposite of each other?

No you cannot know a smile
From the curve of the lips
Or shine of the teeth
It begins and ends in the eyes

So does sadness
The melancholy twin
Who claims more space in the eyes
Than a smile ever can behold

I want to touch the focal point
Where these twins meet
And where the gentle warmth
Delicately turns pale grey 

Like Ram's leg on Ahalya
That touch might be my redemption 
The price of freedom 
From my greyish blue skies...

Friday, October 01, 2021

Feminist!

Every Woman has a story
Of being told “not possible” 
Yet breaking the “not” and making it possible
To stand victorious at the end!

Every woman has a story 
Of being told about her duties
Even before she learns her rights,
That makes her guilty to pursue her dreams!

Every woman has a story 
Of scavenging eyes and unwelcome touch
That is normalised as “natural instincts”,
But portrayed as “scarlet” if she exhibits them!

Every woman has a story
Of being betrayed of tiny promises
And being told it is “silly” to hold on to them,
By the “serious” people who own her life!

Every woman has a story
Of being measured against another
In color and texture and curves and hair,
To shatter her confidence and self worth!

Every woman has a story 
Of being abandoned from the shelter of home
And trying to turn to someone she is not,
To fit a new house which should turn “home”!

Every woman has a story
Of trying to prove her grit and mettle
In a man’s world with man’s laws,
But still maintain the feminine within!

Every woman has a story 
Of motherly instinct and hidden love
That’s mistaken as her weakness,
Until they know the wrath of her love!

Every woman has a story
Of survival and hidden pain and lost dreams 
That makes her vulnerable yet strong,
To enable her to take "man"kind forward!

Every woman has a story
Of emerging out of her fragile body
And the invisible boundaries it create,
To walk away with her head held high!

Every man has a story too
That can always create a “whataboutery” 
But my friend, I am not a “His”storian,
I am just a “Her”storian, and they call me a Feminist!

-Soumya Dharmarajan